*call & respond: assumptions.
What is assumed about married ladies? What is assumed about single ladies? My blog eyes travel far and wide on the Internet block and if there’s one thing that people are passionate about its a relationship or lack there of. And the comments are as colorful as a box of crayons. The consensus: that single women are envious of married women’s security and that married women are jealous of single woman’s freedom. And trust. This argument can’t be won. But my biggest pet peeve is that people assume that once you’re married you’re no longer your own woman I guess you’re his play pony and that you have nothing to add to the conversation of understanding men cause you’ve already got one. Its like because you’re married there’s this assumption that you know all there is to know about men.*Deep Eye Roll* Another assumption: that once you’re married; you’ve arrived into the magical, mystical, fairy tale land where the grass is pink and he’ll buy you all the Louis Vutton bags you’ll ever need along with the perfect gated community home, the hot newly leased whip, trips to Vegas and occasional shopping sprees of lingerie and jewels…considering if you give him enough nookie. What the what? Married life is far from that. The truth: All married women aren’t happy. And lots of married women want out. The guaranteed truth: husbands fart.
Jump on it.
Posted by gt on February 4, 2010
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Tonia — February 4, 2010 @ 6:04 am
LMAO. Your exactly right.
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First L8dy — February 4, 2010 @ 10:12 am
LMBO!!!!!! ALL MEN FART… SOME IN THEIR SLEEP! HAHAHA
My truth is I found myself wanting into married life with a sense of urgency BECUASE I thought that’s what I needed to be happy. Some years later… I have learned I am totally FINE with enjoying and taking full advantage of my “singleness”. After a couple failed reltionships of my own….. and watching the not so blissful married life of friends who rushed in or just happened upon a messed up “situation”… I am perfectly fine to wait until my time… the right time.. the right one…
I think there are alot of “mis-understandings” when it comes to a single person’s view on married life and vice versa… AND since the “nookie” is priceless… I sincerily HOPE the “the husband” (since he’s suppose to have a year round nookie pass (LOL)) can atleast come off of 2 Loui V’s a year??? ***snickers***
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First L8dy — February 4, 2010 @ 10:15 am
Oh, and to answer the question ( I got lost in my own blab)… I always “ass”umed married women had it easier financially.
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B — February 4, 2010 @ 10:41 am
Very true.
I’m not married yet, but in a long-term relationship. It seems that when my single friends complain about men and I chip in my $0.02, I’m automatically dismissed because “I’ve got a good one”. But I’ll be the first to tell you he wasn’t always good, and there were a lot of not-so-good ones before him. In the same vein, I can’t stand women who get into a serious relationship and start acting all brand new, so I guess I can see where some of the dismissal may come from.
At any rate, misunderstandings will abound in this situation, but I just wished that the presence or absence of a man didn’t have such an effect on how a woman is perceived.
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gt — February 4, 2010 @ 10:52 am
“At any rate, misunderstandings will abound in this situation, but I just wished that the presence or absence of a man didn’t have such an effect on how a woman is perceived.”-B
da truth.
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ceecee — February 4, 2010 @ 11:57 am
“But my biggest pet peeve is that people assume that once you’re married you’re no longer your own woman I guess you’re his play pony and that you have nothing to add to the conversation of understanding men cause you’ve already got one”
I disagree, I feel like married women don’t want to share their experiences on how they landed their mate or how their relationships are going. Kinda like a don’t tell policy if you will. And from my experience, they usually will not take advice from their single friends…but, hey what do I know.
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gt — February 4, 2010 @ 12:14 pm
@CeeCee….I’m pretty much an open book so you can ask me…
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kristine — February 4, 2010 @ 12:42 pm
I have one single friend in particular who thinks people who are married live in a romance novel. One day she asked me if I ever get annoyed with my husband. I said, “ Yes! And I’m sure if you asked him, he’d say the same about me.” This shocked her.
I hate the remark, “Well, you shouldn’t have anything to complain about- you’re married.” I have to remind my single friends that I have many of the same issues, problems, quirks, habits, and eccentricity I had before I was married, now I’m in a situation where I have his to attend to (to an extent) as well as mine.
Thankfully I have found someone who can put up with me , for better or worse – yet that in no way removes me from being able to relate to things that single friends go through.
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ceecee — February 4, 2010 @ 1:41 pm
thanks GT
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Gem — February 4, 2010 @ 1:57 pm
My friends always ask me about married life and I tell them the good and bad stuff. I hate when women act like it’s some magical secret like ceecee mentioned. I am the opposite.
Also, my husband has NEVER “tooted” in front of me and we’ve been together almost 5 years. Now if you ask me that question however…
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Vonmiwi — February 4, 2010 @ 2:50 pm
(Golf Clapping!) So true, so true! I had no idea that it entailed days of being ignored for video, card and sport games, only to be paid attention to during a commercial break or beer break.
I also found out it doesn’t matter how much in love you’re in, you can still be alone in the relationship. I had some growing up to do and I found out that a man is not solely responsible for my happiness and is not a plan, I was.
Today, I’m divorced and stress free. Would I get married today if offered the best man in the world? No. I’m actually enjoying my life and we’re still on amicable terms.
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First L8dy — February 4, 2010 @ 3:10 pm
Well in that case GT…… (tee hee)
How in the world do you transition into “wifey” from bachlorette??
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gt — February 4, 2010 @ 6:10 pm
@ First Lady…
There’s a reason why there’s tons of relationship ideologies because one size simply does not fit all. In speaking for myself there really wasn’t any formula. I did a lot of emotional work on myself to deem my own worth (and still do it to this day), focused on things that I enjoyed doing and well the rest is history. For me there is no “how to” because all women don’t want marriage…sometimes you simply just want to be loved unconditionally.
In a relationship the things that I value are integrity, commitment, humor and whether the person has a good/kind heart. The next woman might not value those things cause it doesn’t =dollar signs. And I honestly don’t judge but the most important thing I want to communicate to women is to learn how to like yourself….
All I’m saying is…don’t let yourself get crusty.
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joijoy — February 5, 2010 @ 9:22 am
Hi Everybody!
I’ve been a voyeur on GT for a LONG time and I’d like to end that in 2010! lol I’m fortunate on my single life journey in that I’ve reached a place where my single and married friends all serve a different and special purpose in my life. For example one of my dearest married friends has a great marriage that I truly admire. I remember her saying to me that when she realized that letting her husband be the man that he was supposed to be in the relationship strengthened their bond and I took note of that! She has been able to maintain her sense of self (she’s mad fly) while adding mommy, wife, etc to the mix and I love that about her. As for me I’m single, don’t want to be married and I’m cool with that. The one thing that concerns me is some of the desperation that I’ve witnessed first hand from some single women who want to be married for “the wedding day” – but they don’t think about the marriage as a whole being such a long term commitment. My dad often says that my mom may have made me too independent to a fault! He could have a point and I’m working on that …LOL ok I’m off the therapy couch…:-)
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First L8dy — February 5, 2010 @ 10:04 am
AMEN GT! Amen, Amen, and AMEN AGAIN!!!!
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gt — February 5, 2010 @ 11:34 am
Welcome joijoy! I think you hit on to something which will be next week’s conversation…..
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joijoy — February 5, 2010 @ 7:23 pm
@gt thx for welcome!
UH oh can’t wait to see what you come up with for next week’s convo….enjoy your weekend 
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TJ — February 8, 2010 @ 5:44 pm
Um I’ve been married almost 14 years and if anybody finds out about the endless LV bags (or Chloe bags or Balenciaga bags or… you get the picture) please feel free to hit me up
As for men that don’t fart in front of you, be careful where you light a match, Gem. I’m just saying. Somebody’s gonna blow. LOLOLOL.
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Shang — February 9, 2010 @ 2:18 pm
I totally agree with joijoy!!! She hit it right on the head!
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